The birth of Rivi — JORDAN PETTY

MAMA: MY GREATEST ROLE YET

June 23rd 2020—the day that would forever change our lives. The day Rivi Ryin Petty was born. I gave birth to Rivi naturally in our home and it was the most amazing experience. I’m still on such a high when I think about her birth. I have never prepared for anything the way I prepared for birth. It was the hardest, most rewarding thing that I have ever done and I am so proud of myself for it. Experiencing something so natural and primal, in its purest and raw form, was the most surreal thing. Birth and pregnancy is so beautiful. From conception to birth, everything that happens to form and create and grow this tiny human is literally miraculous. Women’s bodies are amazing. We are so strong and capable of more than we think.

I was able to have my safe and beautiful home birth that I wanted, which gave us the most beautiful and healthy baby girl. I am so thankful. To my body, my Midwife and birth team, baby girl’s role in her birth, for Bryce, the protection over us both…all of it aligned so beautifully and I am just so grateful for it all. It was truly a God thing.

BIRTH STORY

Rivi ended up coming 3 weeks early at 37 weeks + 2 days. During my entire pregnancy I’d always felt like she was going to come early so it was really sweet and affirming that it actually happened that way. During the first week of June, I began having some light cramping. I didn’t think too much of it since I was nearing the end of pregnancy and figured it were normal. However, I had a feeling. I kept telling Bryce that I felt things were kickstarting—I could just feel that the process was beginning. Mind you, I was only 35 weeks at this point and not due until July. Sure enough, that next week I lost part of my mucus plug which confirmed in me that things were starting. I called my midwife that morning and she told me to go home, rest and take it easy that day since I was still so early. I was actually on my way to church that morning getting ready to help lead worship that day haha! I continued to lose parts of my mucus plug throughout that week so we decided it’d be best to put me on a mild bedrest for those remaining two weeks, just until I reached 37 weeks. In Midwifery care, you must be at least 37 weeks to be a safe candidate for home birth, so we wanted to make sure and reach that 37 week mark. That whole week I was having loose stools, diarrhea, cramping and lots of pressure in my pelvis—all early/beginning signs of labor. The night of June 15th, I noticed things were a bit off with my body after dinner. My heart rate felt super fast and I had this random shortness of breath while trying to talk to Bryce. It was not normal for me. I took my blood pressure to see if anything was off and sure enough, my blood pressure was high. I took it again about 30 minutes later after lying in bed to try and rest it off and it was slightly higher, so we called our midwife. She placed me on strict bedrest and we were to monitor my blood pressure every day until my appointment that coming week. We made a plan to do some labs and bloodwork at the upcoming appointment to assess both baby and I and to make sure it was safe to keep Rivi inside till that 37 week mark. I stayed on strict bedrest those few days until my appointment—my blood pressure remained fairly high, but bedrest was helping keep it at a safe level. I was also put on a very high protein diet and had to drink lots of fluids. Our appointment was on the 18th and we got an ultrasound done to check baby, fluid levels, see if it would still be a safe option to deliver at home, etc… This is why I absolutely love my Midwife—she kept the safety of Rivi and I as her top priority, even if we wouldn’t have had the option to birth at home anymore.

We had a great report at our appointment! Rivi looked great and was so healthy. It was so sweet getting to see her right before she was born! We hadn’t had an ultrasound since our 20 week anatomy scan so seeing her little side profile was everything. After finding out Rivi would be completely safe to be born at 37 weeks, our Midwife thought it was best to start discussing our options to get her out since my blood pressure was still remaining high. We also wanted to see if my body would be receptive to starting the labor process at 37 weeks. We did a cervical check at that same appointment and my body was already 1cm dilated and thinning out! It was already starting to prepare! Baby girl was ready to come out. I was so excited to know that my body was starting the process on its own. After discovering this, we discussed our options for moving forward. Still with a high blood pressure, we knew getting her out early (now knowing that she would be COMPLETELY SAFE) was the best option. My body just wasn’t willing to house her anymore. However, and again why I absolutely love my midwife, we were presented with multiple options. We were never forced into anything and Bryce and I were able to make the choice of how we wanted to move forward. I am still so grateful for this! This is exactly why I wanted a home birth and a midwife. I never felt out of control of my birth experience.

After discussing our options, we made the informed decision to begin a natural induction regimen with our Midwife that would begin Sunday the 21st. After asking many, many questions, we felt completely comfortable moving forward with the plan. I’m so thankful that she allowed us the time to ask questions/process everything and make the choice that was best for us. She was a saint answering all of our questions haha! Our plan was to insert a Foley Bulb to help kickstart the dilation process and then start the natural induction regimen the following morning. I was already 1cm dilated and we wanted to get to 4cm before beginning the regimen on Monday. We inserted the bulb Sunday morning and by Sunday afternoon, I was already dilated to a 4 and was able to pull out the bulb. We were like giddy little kids realizing that things were starting to happen. We ordered in food and watched movies that night, soaking up the last night of just the two of us. We were so eager to wake up the next morning and start the process of meeting our baby! Going to bed that night felt like Christmas Eve on crack.

I don’t think I’ve ever been so ready to wake up in my entire life. I was so eager to experience birth and to meet Rivi. We got a great night’s rest the night before and I had a killer breakfast before my birth team arrived, all thanks to Bryce. I was ready. I started mentally preparing myself that morning and reciting all my declarations and birth affirmations through my head. We prayed together and officially started the process at 10am that morning. I won’t share with you what all the regimen entailed (it’s like my midwife’s personal secret recipe!) But, lots of walking involved, curb walks, different herbs, etc… After repeating the regimen 3 different times, we decided to take a break. My body wasn’t really kickstarting into labor and we discussed giving my body a break and possibly trying again on Wednesday. I had dilated another 2cm during the regimen but I had no signs of actual active labor/contractions so my team decided to head home early that evening. I was 6cm dilated but not having actual active labor contractions. They told us to call them when things started kicking up and when I wasn't able to talk through contractions anymore. We went to sleep pretty bummed that night knowing that we most likely wouldn’t be meeting our sweet babe that day. I ended up laboring throughout the night on my own. I would fall in and out of sleep and work through some contractions as they came, trying to get as much sleep as possible. Around 3am I remember seeing my doula in our room— I didn’t even know Bryce had called them to come back! I was officially in my own world working through contractions. I got excited when I saw her because I knew that meant things had started. They call the place you go to in your head during birth “labor land”—you’re just out of it and in your own little world, focusing on your breath and the task ahead of you—birth. I was definitely in labor land. I continued working through contractions that whole morning until around 10am. We decided to do another cervical check to see where I was since laboring through the whole night. I was still at 6cm. I won’t lie, I was pretty defeated. And so tired. Hours of contractions and my body hadn’t budged. I told myself to remain hopeful. One of my main goals during birth was to stay positive with my thoughts and words. Words have power. Just one negative thought or sentence could hinder progress and I needed all the positive energy. Birth is just as mental as it is physical.

We started discussing our options having already been in labor for a while but not really progressing anymore. We knew things needed to speed up rather than slow down at this point because of my high blood pressure, which was being safely monitored the whole time. After discussing options, we decided the best choice for us, given the circumstances, was to break my water in hopes to get things going. We lit the candles, turned on my salt lamps, started playing my birth playlist and I mentally prepared again, refocusing on my affirmations and rebuilding my confidence in myself and my successful home birth. I was ready. My midwife broke my water and not even five minutes later I was having contraction on top of contraction. And they were coming hard. Since I was already dilated at a 6, they knew things would most likely progress pretty quickly after we broke my water.

Right after my water broke, I wanted to get in the tub. I knew the water would help ease the intensity of the contractions. The hardest part of my labor were the contractions immediately following breaking my water. They were so intense and coming quickly. It was almost like going from 20% to 100% in a matter of seconds. I labored through these contractions in the shower for what I thought was about 10 minutes. I later found out it was actually about an hour haha! Labor land is real and time does not exist there. I worked through different positions in the shower to try and ease the pressure. I was on my hands and knees for a while with hot water spraying on my lower back, that felt the best. I would grab my birthing ball and rest my elbows on that from time to time. The shower was helping a bit but I just wanted to be fully immersed in water. Like HOT water. The hotter the better. Once they got the tub filled, it felt like a huge sigh of relief. The water felt soooo good to me and I was able to recenter and focus on what was coming next—the pushing phase. I was in transition while in the tub but something seemed to almost be hindering Rivi’s progress from coming down. We just weren’t sure what. After about 2 hours in the tub, my midwife thought it’d be best to get out and try to move around a bit. She and my doula were thinking that Rivi was most likely in an odd position and that’s why things were stalling. I went to the bed and started alternating positions every contraction to try and help Rivi work her way down. I would work through some on my back then flip to my side, labor on my knees, flip to the other side, bring knees to chest, etc…

Bryce was my rock during this phase. With every new position, he would be right there with me, encouraging me and holding my hand. Telling me that I was beautiful and strong and that I could do it. I am truly so thankful to have him as my husband. My birth would have looked a lot different had he not been there. I don’t think I would have been able to birth Rivi naturally without him. He was exactly the support I needed. Bryce, I love you so much. I continued pushing in different positions for about an hour and it helped progress things a bit but things still seemed stalled. I moved to the side of the bed and started squatting during each contraction while pushing at the same time—this was a freaking game changer. It was like an immediate shift with just that change in positioning. I started feeling an increase in pressure and had this inward feeling of needing to push. After a few pushes here, we headed back to the tub and I knew she would be coming soon.

Pushing was my favorite part of labor. It was so primal- my body knew exactly what to do and I was working with it to help bring Rivi down. It felt so natural and I had never been so connected with my body. I am so thankful for this. One of my desires of birth was that my body would be doing the pushing for me, and I was able to experience that. With every push, my excitement rose as I knew I was one push closer to meeting our baby. I’d dreamt about the moment of meeting her for so long and here I was, living out that moment. It was so emotional. I was able to feel her head throughout the pushing phase which gave me a huge confidence boost to keep going because with every push her head would emerge a bit more but then immediately slide back in. It’s like we would take two steps forward and then five steps back. We couldn’t figure out what the hold up was and why it was taking a while. Pushing is truly exhausting but knowing that I would have my baby in my arms soon was all the motivation I needed. I remember telling Bryce at this point that I was tired and that this was hard. I made sure not to say I couldn’t do it, again, knowing that my words have power. Staying positive here to keep progressing was very hard. My body was exhausted.

Then, after four active hours of pushing, the last push would change my life forever. At 4:43pm, I pushed and there was her whole head, her tiny body immediately following. I was in shock. Did I really just birth my baby? I had been pushing for so long it felt like she was never going to come. She came out so quickly it didn’t feel real. It was like all the exhaustion and defeat of the past four hours just vanished. Both Bryce and I helped grab her and brought her up to my chest. I will never forget that moment. The moment I became a mom. The moment we laid eyes on our baby for the first time. The tears started flowing as we stared at Rivi, examining every inch of her in disbelief. She was here. She was ours. And she was so perfect. We were both in awe! It is such an indescribable moment. As I laid in the tub with Rivi on my chest, allowing the water to drain in the tub, I could not stop staring at her. She was so beautiful. I couldn’t believe that God gave us this perfect little human. All I kept saying was “you’re so beautiful!”

Rivi ended up being in an Occiput Posterior Position, or also known as being “sunny side up”. Meaning, she was head down but she was facing my abdomen. Her Occipital bone (skull) was against my pelvis, which completely explains the length of my labor, why things weren’t progressing and why the pushing phase lasted so long. Her head was literally getting stuck on my pelvis each time I would push. My labor totaled 31 hours, with 6 of those being active and 4 being pushing alone. Our beautiful girl joined us Earth side weighing 6 pounds 5 ounces and 20.5 inches long.

We walked to the bed and I laid down with her on my chest, immediately allowing her to nurse. I had no idea what I was doing but she did. She inched up my chest and immediately latched on. And there our connection began. It was so beautiful, and again, all primal at the same time. We had our skin to skin time while we waited for the placenta to be birthed. We chose to do delayed cord clamping, so once the placenta was out, they did Rivi’s newborn exam while allowing her to receive all the extra blood and nutrients being passed by the placenta to her. Once they were done, Bryce made me a bowl of fruit and fed me (he’s literally an angel) while Rivi was nursing. Daddy got some skin to skin time next while they did my assessment, checking to see if I needed stitches or anything. I am so thankful that I did not tear or need stitches. I owe this all to my birth team, knowing when to tell me to push and when to tell me to relax so I had a better chance of not tearing. Once both exams were done and we were both deemed safe and healthy, we sat in bed together as a family (koa included, of course) and just soaked up the moment. We stared at Rivi and couldn’t stop smiling. We were a family. It’s one of those moments in life you’ll never forget. Koa was so interested in Rivi from the very beginning, it was so cute to see. He kept licking her feet and trying to figure out what she was! He was beside me during the entire birth. He knew something was up and wanted to comfort me the whole time. He is truly the best dog ever and I’m so happy I decided to have him there while Rivi entered the world. Sounds crazy, but Koa comforted me in ways he’ll never know during my birth.

My birth team stayed with us for hours after the birth making sure we were okay, cleaning for us and taking care of us. They are angels on this Earth and I am so thankful for them. I had the best team surrounding me. After they left, we laid in bed the rest of night until we all fell asleep. Birthing at home was so convenient because we didn’t have to go anywhere. We had no one interrupting us and we could just lay in our own bed and snuggle our new babe all night. Waking up that next morning with a baby in my arms was truly the best morning ever. My life was forever changed. Rivi Ryin, we love you so much.